'Idol' Thoughts On The Guys: Week One

Former boy bander Robbie Carrico throws it out there that he toured with Britney Spears but failed to mention they dated. He was cuter as a boy bander. It’s time to cut the hair.  Why does Ryan act like a giddy schoolboy around him? Oh. Because he thinks he looks like Justin Timberlake.

I guarantee tomorrow I’m going to get a phone call from my mother telling me how “cute” she thinks David Archuleta is. Plus, he’s singing a song from her era, “Shop Around!” Too bad the moms and grandmas don’t actually pick up the phone and vote he’d be a shoo-in to win the whole thing. I’m sure his fan group, The Arch Angels, will pick up their slack and then some.

Is it just me or does Danny Noriega remind anyone else of Tyra Banks when he purses his lips together? Despite what Simon says I liked his performance. You have to admit he at least sings better than Sanjaya. Not surprisingly, he’s first out of the gate for votefortheworst.com to back.

It’s the return of whacked out Paula who can’t spit her words out!

Next up, Luke Menard who is HOT! Oops he’s married. Well, he just lost my vote. I kid. I kid. Those good looks are going to have to carry him through the fact that up until now he has had zero airtime. Ladies start dialing.

Self proclaimed Ellen DeGeneres look-a-like Colton Berry gets the award for most annoying tonight. Admittedly though, he’s a good singer but he needs to lose the bad habit I caught him doing today, smoking. His decent performance certainly puts him above the other never-before-seens, Jason Yaeger and Luke Menard. 

Simon is making up for being too nice during audition rounds and the claws are back out tonight! Thirty minutes still left to go. AHHHHHH!!!!!

Garrett reminds me of a bad 80’s movie character. At least this kid falls under the undiscovered talent category that this season seems to be lacking and doesn’t have a true performing background. My mother’s next phone call will be to say, “he needs to cut that hair.” His lack of airtime has him possibly on the chopping block but he does have the cute factor.

Why do the judges rip these people to shreds for their performances? They’re the ones who PUT THEM HERE!

Bravo to Jason Castro for busting out the guitar. That’s how someone with zero airtime stands out.  He’ll be the only one I remember from tonight’s show.  He’s already got a group of fans who are calling themselves the “dread heads” so expect him to sail through this week.

Finally, the end is here with Michael Johns in “the pimp spot” as "Idol" stalkers and bloggerazzis like to call it. That’s the spot at the end of the show where the person has the best chance of being remembered and therefore might garner the most votes. They believe the producers put them there for a reason.  I still am annoyed that an Australian guy is in a show called “American Idol.” The girls in our office think he’s hot. I don’t but he did win a few points with this performance. He reminds me of late INXS singer Michael Hutchence. Randy apparently agrees with me.  He’s definitely a Top 12 contender.