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Monday TV Overload And An Early Morning Wake Up Call
With all this Michael Jackson news I'm feeling very lonely around the Access Hollywood offices. Everyone is busy and in newshound mode while little old me is still in Dish of Salt mode. Frankly, I like it that way. You know I can't live without my TV!
Last night was like sensory overload. After yet another doctor appointment (someone please figure out what's wrong with me soon!) I was not allowed to go to the gym. So, I arrived home at 6 PM with nothing to do. Fortunately, my TV was calling my name with tons of goodies. "Weeds" was on at 7 PM on Showtime I ponder - do we want Nancy with the evil mayor slash drug lord or should she and Andy, brother-in-law of dead husband, hook up? I can't decide.
"Nurse Jackie" followed at 7:30 PM. How can Jackie be cheating on that adorable, hunky and might I add younger (Go Edie Falco!) husband with the balding pharmacist guy!? I don't get it.
Then it was two hours of "The Bachelorette" on ABC, which was by far the MOST craptastic episode ever. Fans of the show will get that joke. Jillian goes on her hometown dates. I decided I need to marry into Kiptyn's family who clearly have some moolah. She zips through three other hometown dates in record time. At this point it's 8:50 PM and I'm wondering how they will fill the next hour and ten minutes. Then pilot Jake returns to stalk Jillian in Austin.
Jake comes back to alert our girl Jillian that Wes has a girlfriend, whose name just happens to be Laurel. Being that I know way too much about this show, within seconds I was texting friends in Texas to see if said 'Laurel' was the same girl who former 'Bachelor' Brad Womack was supposedly dating while his show was airing. They are both from Austin, TX, which, as I'm told, is a pretty small town. The odds that two guys on the same reality show were dating the same girl were pretty good. Turns out I was right. Same girl. Maybe she should be the next Bachelorette?
Jake, for some reason deciding it would be a good idea to wear his pilot uniform (as if this makes him more official), rats out Wes then later cries on the balcony...hopefully because he knows he looks like an idiot on national TV and not because he still has the hots for Jillian. Jillian confronts Wes. Wes denies. Then wham bam Ed returns, which was not really a surprise to me since my boy Reality Steve already found out this juicy info. He gets all the good scoops -- but remember I promised not to dish any dirt this season. I do have that envelope buried still which names the final four, whom I learned about prior to the show starting. Are they the right names? You'll have to come back and find out.
Trust me. It's worth it.
Back to Ed, who left after deciding "work was too important" and came back because he couldn't stop thinking about Jillian and just had to come back for her. If you believe that... I have some snow to sell you in Alaska.
Wes, Kiptyn, Reid and Ed each get a rose and poor hyper Michael, the guy with the puppy love crush on Jillian gets sent home along with winemaker Jesse.
Next, I just had to check out Oxygen's new show "Dance Your Ass Off," which if you haven't watched, you must tune in next week. It's like a "Saturday Night Live" skit except everyone is in on the joke. You know you shouldn't laugh but you do anyway -- and the great thing is everyone on the show is laughing too. It's better than a train wreck, it's a clown car wreck. I loved every second of it and will be tuning in every week to laugh my ass off.
Finally, went to bed around 11:30 PM only to have the clock chime five hours later. It was "American Idol" audition day here in Los Angeles. As I arrive to the Rose Bowl I'm pretty confident it will be a smaller crowd than we saw in season six which took place a couple of months after season five aired -- the most watched season ever. Clearly there is no way more than 8,000 people will show up for season nine.
I was wrong. 11,000 people showed up to audition. The most of any LA audition ever. I think I'm going to surmise that the Adam Lambert factor has people more interested in the show than ever. Oh, and guess who turned 16 and is ready to audition?
Ashly Ferl -- aka Sanjaya's crying girl.
She was apparently one of the first in line at auditions this morning. You know the producers will put her through to Simon, Randy and Paula just because it's a good story (even if she can't sing). I wonder if she cried when Sanjaya got voted out of "I'm A Celebrity...Get Me Out Of Here!"?
So finally, in eight seasons of covering auditions I have never once met anyone in line who made it to the Top 12... or even the top 36 for that matter. However, today there was this one guy named Danny from Los Angeles. Watch the auditions video. This guy has got the "IT" factor for sure, and if he doesn't make it through it would be a shame. He's got my vote already.
Go Danny with the green Bob Marley t-shirt and the green eyes!
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