Access Blogs
Michael Jackson: A Parent's Perspective
By Terri MacLeodThe King of Pop will live on forever. The gravity-defying moonwalk, the sequined glove, the cropped pants, and black loafers - Michael defined my generation. I can document my life by his music. When the news broke of his sudden death, I (like the rest of the world) was stunned, shocked and saddened - now a week later, I still can't believe Michael Jackson is gone!
When I returned home from work on June 25, I told my 14-year-old daughter about his death. ...To which she replied, "Why are you upset about him? Isn't he the creepy guy who slept with young boys?"
My daughter's reaction shocked me! She had no appreciation or understanding of Michael's musical legacy. Obviously, this generation isn't growing-up on Michael. Most tweens today are familiar with his dance moves and mega-hits like "Billie Jean" or "Thriller," but for the most part Michael's 'Wacko Jacko' reputation eclipsed his immense talent, or, seemingly so to my daughter.
While, I am not here to debate Michael's addiction to painkillers, his questionable relationship with children, or his gasp-worthy plastic surgery, I do believe there are many life lessons we as parents can pass on to our children about Michael's complicated and seemingly very lonely life.
For starters, let's try and get our kids to stop and listen to the music. Michael is, in my opinion, the greatest entertainer our generation has ever seen! He set off a global phenomenon that is rarely seen and quite possibly will never be seen again. His music, his dancing, and his outright sheer genius as a performer, is something to celebrate and be inspired by. For a moment, try and forget all the craziness in his later years and let his music get passed on to the next generation, and hopefully, set into motion a new crop of young artists. As Michael once said, "I always wanted to do music that influences and inspires each generation."
On a deeper level, there's much to learn from Michael's tragic life,
which brings to the forefront the age-old lesson -- money and fame
don't buy happiness. Just like iconic superstars Elvis and Marilyn
Monroe before him, worldwide adulation and oodles of money were
ultimately tied to his downfall. I always felt sorry for Michael. The
strange outfits and odd behavior always seemed to me like a cry for
help.
As an entertainment producer at Access Hollywood, I got the opportunity to meet Michael and yes, I must admit his appearance was off-putting, and his frail frame and timid voice all made him very sad and not at all like the superstar personality you would expect! It's easy to judge others by their appearance, yet it's important to remind our children just because somebody doesn't look like us or dresses odd, this doesn't give them a free pass to prejudice another.
In Michael's own words, "People can always have judgment about anything you do. So it doesn't bother me. Everything can be strange to someone." The masks, the whitening skin, the multiple nose jobs -- while only Michael will truly know what motivated him to change his appearance, it's not right to make snap judgments on Michael or any person for that matter, based solely on their look - a lesson all children should be taught - especially if we want to live in a loving world.
I always try to tell my daughter the most important things in life are the simple: love, family, and happiness. You can't help but wonder if the King of Pop was a very sensitive man, who struggled most of his life with feeling true love and happiness. He grew-up in an allegedly abusive home, and often revealed during interviews the pain and betrayal caused by those around him. In his later years, Michael lived isolated and the only people who he seemed to spend time with and truly enjoy were his three children. And, by all accounts, Michael was a doting dad and his children were well mannered and kind. Watching home videos of Michael on a morning show recently with his two youngest kids dancing, singing, and spending time together gave me the chills - it all seemed so loving and normal... Something Michael seemingly cherished and perhaps never got during his childhood or at the height of his fame.
Being part of a loving family and having close friends is an awesome gift, and at the end of the day, it's the only thing that truly matters. Yes, Michael had fame and fortune beyond most of our wildest dreams, but did he really ever have the supportive family and friends? In the end, Michael seemed to finally obtain the unconditional love he so desperately wanted from his three children. Sad!
But, as I tell my daughter, everyday there's no greatest source of happiness than love! So, tell your children to cherish the people in their lives. It is a blessing to be able to go home and give that special someone - who you know has your back no matter what - a hug and tell them, 'I love you,' and know they truly love you back simply for being who you are!
Hopefully Michael finally got to feel that love in his greatest role -- as Dad.
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Terri MacLeod is a senior producer at Access Hollywood. She is also the author of the recently released girl power guide, "113 Things To Do By 13." ...And above all, she is a mom!
As an entertainment producer at Access Hollywood, I got the opportunity to meet Michael and yes, I must admit his appearance was off-putting, and his frail frame and timid voice all made him very sad and not at all like the superstar personality you would expect! It's easy to judge others by their appearance, yet it's important to remind our children just because somebody doesn't look like us or dresses odd, this doesn't give them a free pass to prejudice another.
In Michael's own words, "People can always have judgment about anything you do. So it doesn't bother me. Everything can be strange to someone." The masks, the whitening skin, the multiple nose jobs -- while only Michael will truly know what motivated him to change his appearance, it's not right to make snap judgments on Michael or any person for that matter, based solely on their look - a lesson all children should be taught - especially if we want to live in a loving world.
I always try to tell my daughter the most important things in life are the simple: love, family, and happiness. You can't help but wonder if the King of Pop was a very sensitive man, who struggled most of his life with feeling true love and happiness. He grew-up in an allegedly abusive home, and often revealed during interviews the pain and betrayal caused by those around him. In his later years, Michael lived isolated and the only people who he seemed to spend time with and truly enjoy were his three children. And, by all accounts, Michael was a doting dad and his children were well mannered and kind. Watching home videos of Michael on a morning show recently with his two youngest kids dancing, singing, and spending time together gave me the chills - it all seemed so loving and normal... Something Michael seemingly cherished and perhaps never got during his childhood or at the height of his fame.
Being part of a loving family and having close friends is an awesome gift, and at the end of the day, it's the only thing that truly matters. Yes, Michael had fame and fortune beyond most of our wildest dreams, but did he really ever have the supportive family and friends? In the end, Michael seemed to finally obtain the unconditional love he so desperately wanted from his three children. Sad!
But, as I tell my daughter, everyday there's no greatest source of happiness than love! So, tell your children to cherish the people in their lives. It is a blessing to be able to go home and give that special someone - who you know has your back no matter what - a hug and tell them, 'I love you,' and know they truly love you back simply for being who you are!
Hopefully Michael finally got to feel that love in his greatest role -- as Dad.
================================================
Terri MacLeod is a senior producer at Access Hollywood. She is also the author of the recently released girl power guide, "113 Things To Do By 13." ...And above all, she is a mom!
This was written very well and I agree.
I am saddened by Michael Jackson's death and I found a VERY interesting, yet scary article! Could MJ's death of been murder by the hospital?
Read here:
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1884738/michael_jacksons_deatha_hospital_murder.html?cat=49
Some people are worth MORE dead than alive!!!!
THIS IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOO TRUE!!IT'S A GREAT ARTICLE AND YES, IT'S SUCH A SHAME THAT PEOPLE WERE INFLUENCED BY HIS MEDIA-CREATED IMAGE AND NEVER TRIED TO LOOK BEYOND IT.IT'S SO SAD THAT MANY OF US UNDERSTAND THIS RIGHT NOW WHEN HE IS NO LONGER WITH US.I LOVED HIS MUSIC, I LOVED HIM AS AN ARTIST, AS A GENIUS THAT HE WAS(AND I WILL FOREVER LOVE HIM THIS WAY) AND I NEVER CARED ABOUT WHAT WAS WRITTEN IN THE PAPERS.HE WAS UNIQUE, NO ONE WILL EVER EVER REPLACE HIM AND I'M GONNA MISS HIM SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO VERY MUCH!!!! HIS MUSIC IS SO PROFOUND AND HIS VOICE....YES, HIS VOICE COULD GO THROUGH EVERY EMOTION POSSIBLE. YOU CAN FEEL ANGER,DESPAIR,LOSS,HURT.... HIS VOICE WAS SO EXPRESSIVE AND THIS IS THE FIRST THING THAT GOT TO ME WHEN I FIRST LISTENED TO HIS SONGS.I GREW UP WITH HIM(I AM SO PROUD I WAS BORN IN 1982 , THE YEAR HE RELEASED "THRILLER") AND SINCE I WAS 7-8 YEARS OLD I LOVED HIS MUSIC BECAUSE I COULD FEEL EMOTIONS IN HIS SONGS, I COULD FEEL BY THE TONE OF HIS VOICE WHAT HIS SONGS WERE ABOUT AS I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND ENGLISH THAT TIME(I AM FROM ROMANIA).
GOD, THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO WRITE HERE, THINGS THAT WOULD CELEBRATE HIS MEMORY AS AN ARTIST , BUT I AM CLOSE TO CRYING AGAIN. I'M GONNA MISS HIM FOREVER, BUT HE'LL BE IN MY HEART AND NEVER BE FORGOTTEN. GOD BLESS HIS SOUL BECAUSE GOD CREATED HIM AND NOW HE WANTS HIM BACK AS HIS TIME ON EARTH HAS ENDED. R.I.P., MICHAEL JACKSON, A TRUE LEGEND AND A TRUE GENIUS!
Hello, my name is Shawna and I wanted to thank you for writing a blog that is so honest and endearing about Micheal Jackson, like you I grew up on Micheal music and legacy. I too have children and my children absolutely love Micheal Jackson. I remember one time when my son was about 6 years old this was right after the trial accusing Micheal of molesting a boy. My son said to me momma Michael Jackson's not weird he just really lonely. I couldn't believe my ears because he was so right out of the mouth of a child. I then realized why Micheal loved children so much because they didn't see him for his flaws they loved him for who he was like so many did when we were children. I just want say to all those people out there who didn't know Micheal, it's easy to be cynical buts hard to be forgiving and loving, remember beauty is only skin deep ugly is to the bone and Micheal to me was the most meek and beautiful man. The bible says that the meek will see god. I think people get fixated on image and forget what's inside a person. Micheal Jackson anxiety about his apperciance was his own demon we all have fear insecurity's of own. Don't judge a person by there fear and weakness embrace them with love and need to be love and compassion. Remember that.
I cried and cried through the entire memorial service.
And, I too ask the questions:
WHERE WERE ALL THESE SO CALLED F-R-I-E-N-D-S WHEN MICHEAL NEEDED THEM?
WHERE WERE ALL THESE SO CALLED F-R-I-E-N-D-S WHEN:
- WHEN HE WAS DYING IN FRONT OF OUR EYES?
- WHEN HE WAS STRUGGLING WITH ADDICTION TO PAIN KILLING DRUGS?
- WHEN HE WAS BEING PERSECUTED?
HE WAS ONE OF THEIR OWN.
WHY DID THEY NOT COME TOGETHER THEN IN PUBLIC SUPPORT OF ONE OF THEIR OWN?
WHY DID THEY NOT COME TOGETHER AND FIGHT TO SAVE ONE OF THEIR OWN?
WHY DID THEY NOT COME TOGETHER AND HELP ONE OF THEIR OWN FIND A WAY TO LIVE WITH THE CIRCUMSTANCES OF HIS UNIQUE SITUATION?
THIS IS WHY I CRIED AND CRIED AND CRIED. I FEEL SUCH RAGE TOWARDS THESE PEOPLE WHO CLAIMED THEY WERE SUCH GREAT F-R-I-E-N-D-S - BUT WERE NOT THERE FOR HIM WHEN HE NEEDED THEM.
I BELIEVE THE TRUTH IS THAT MICHAEL DID NOT HAVE ANYONE HE COULD REALLY CALL ON.
I BELIEVE THE TRUTH IS THAT HE DID NOT HAVE C-O-M-M-U-N-I-T-Y, A GROUP WITHIN WHICH HE COULD SIT IN ACCEPTANCE, LOVE, PRAISE, CARE AND PEACE. BECAUSE OF THIS, I FEEL SUCH RAGE TOWARDS ALL THOSE HYPOCRITES WHO SHUNNED HIM IN LIFE AND YESTERDAY HAD THE AUDACITY TO STAND BEFORE THE WORLD AND CALL THEMSELVES HIS FRIENDS.
I AM GLAD MICHEAL IS WITH GOD NOW. MAY HE REST IN PEACE.
WE LOVE YOU, MICHAEL.
YOU MEANT SO MUCH TO US.
i'm 16 years old and i listen to rap music most of the time but i can tell you michael never did anything with little boys. he was innocent and just truly loved children of all kind. as far as his face goes..he couldn't help the skin color..he did have vitilligo and whatever he didn to even out his skin..he HAD to do it..cus people would've looked at him weirdd if he walked around with blotches all over his body but he never bleached his skin!..and his surgery..who are we to judge him for changing something he didn't like?..have you seen the gurls in hollywood now a day with hugee boobs and big ass lips??..nobody says anything about them but yeah lets pick on the guy with REAL talent!..lets ignore the good things he did for kids & let's blame him for molesting them..what kinda place is this?..you can go anywhere in this world and see that everybody loves michael..but here in the u.s. we didn't appreciate him & now that he's gone we still keep talkin shit about him..it's really sad..but your right hes a legend and everybody should know about him. '
rest in peace mj!! we love you and miss you soo much!!
I agree Michael was an amazing father and he finally got the unconditional love he needed from his 3 children!